Post by Press1269 on Feb 20, 2020 16:45:30 GMT
PERCY: What in the hell did we just witness?
CAT: I don't know, but this whole god damn show has given me one anxiety attack after another. First with that fucking bear, and now GIANT SPIDERS!?! What the hell?
PERCY: Well, maybe this springboard back to violence will help alleviate your worries, cause it's Main Event time! Calvin Harris has consistently goaded and one upped the PAW Champion, Press, in the past few shows, but you've gotta believe one on one, with no interference thanks to an electrified steel cage, Press is going to get himself some retribution!
CAT: Are you kidding me, Percival? Calvin Harris has been claiming to be the real deal from the start, and despite nay-sayers like 'YOU', he's done more than prove that he should be the next PAW Champion.
PERCY: Yeah, everything but actually become the champion.
CAT: You know...Percy, I hope you're paying attention, cause you're going to eat those words after this is over. Rhonda, take it away!
RHONDA ARMSTRONG: Ladies and Gentleman, this is your Main Event of the evening, and is an Electrified Steel Cage Match for the PAW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP! Both competitors will be locked within the structure, and then 50 watts will be run through the cage at random intervals. The only way to win is by pinfall, submission, or escaping the cage.
Bullet For My Valentine's "Your Betrayal" hits over the arena's speakers, the guitar riff kicking it all off, and the boo's coming instantaneously. Out of the curtain steps Calvin Harris, his eyes scanning the packed out house of jeering fans with a smug smirk on his lips. The boo's intensify, if that were even possible, as Calvin rolls his head around with his neck, and then looks straight ahead at the ring. The smirk never leaves his face as he stretches both arms out to either side of him, nodding as the fans poured on the hate as if it were fueling him. After a few moments he lowered his arms back down at his side and begins to slowly make his way down the ramp.
RHONDA ARMSTRONG: Introducing first the challenger, from Chicago, Illinois. Weighing in at 227 pounds. Representing the Power Trio, he is the #1 Contender, The Martyr of Pro Wrestling. . . CALVIN HARRIS!
Calvin continues his confident saunter down to ringside, and if the crowd's reaction bothers him, he doesn't show it at all. He stops once he reaches the bottom of the ramp, and stares up at the steel structure around the ring, seeming to be satisfied with it's design. He steps around the cage until reaching the steps leading up to the single door entry, and he climbs up onto the ring apron, and then swings into the ring through the ropes. He grabs the cage and shakes it, knowing that in a few short minutes it would be electrified, and he cockily laughs before climbing up on the nearest corner. Again he stares at the crowd who has such venom for him, and again he throws his arms out at his sides, just taunting them for no other reason that there wasn't anything they could do about it. Finally, he drops down from the corner, and stretches along the ropes, watching the entrance where his opponent will be.
PERCY: Calvin looks more than ready for this experience, Cat, and now that this match is a reality, I think the champion may just have met his match.
CAT: You say that like it's the first time anyone's ever said it, Percy. Calvin Harris has done everything he needed to do in the past few months to undermine the champion, leave him and his partner laying, and this steel cage is the final nail in the coffin of Press' championship reign, if not his career.
PERCY: You know, Cat, everything you're saying is true, but the more you build this guy, the more I want Press to cram it down his throat.
CAT: Well then you'll be crying along with everyone else, cause Harris is going to deliver on his promises.
The lights go dim as "Strangle Hold" begins to blare across the arena, and the fans pull a complete 180, the cheers nearly drowning out the music. Red strobe-lights begin to flicker all around the ring and ramp way, and finally settle on the entry way where the silhouette of the massive Press can be seen standing in the curtain. These words can be seen clearly up on the four small screens.
WITH THIS PASS
I CAN GO ANYWHERE I DAMN WELL PLEASE!
As soon as the words begin the figure moves out into the lights, the PAW Heavyweight Championship dangling from his right hand, a steel chair with the words 'Press Pass' written across the seat in the other. He stares straight down at the ring, his face stoic and etched in stone. The hand holding the championship slowly rises into the air and the fans go completely berserk, while the lights suddenly come back to full.
RHONDA ARMSTRONG: And his opponent, hailing from New Orleans, Louisiana, and standing at 6 foot 10, and weighting in at 365 pounds, representing one half of The BombTrax, he is the PAW Heavyweight Champion, PRESS!
The Championship drops to his side and he stalks down the ramp without anymore bravado. When he reaches ringside, he tosses the chair to the floor, and hands the belt to A-Ref before climbing the steps and entering the ring. Calvin Harris rushes in to meet him, but Press doesn't give him the chance before catching with a right hand that sends him down to the mat. Harris bounces up quickly, and he's thundered back down with another right. One more time Harris comes to his feet, and this time Press takes him by the hair of the head and rushes him head long into the steel door that A-Ref is desperately trying to latch. The door flies open on impact, tangling Calvin up in the ropes, and striking A-Ref which sends him sailing into the steel guard rail at ringside, while the championship he was holding skitters across the cement floor. Calvin scrambles to get untangled as Press wades in, contempt clear upon his face. Just as Calvin gets himself unhooked, Press comes in with a double axe handle down across Calvin's shoulders which hammer through the ropes and out onto the steps. Before he can get too far, Press grabs him by the hair of the head, and rams him face first into the door jam. Calvin falls off of the steel steps down to the concrete, and the big man steps through the ropes to come out after him.
PERCY: GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY THE BELL HASN'T EVEN RUNG!
CAT: Get that cheater back into the cage!
PERCY: Who, Cat? A-Ref's still laid out on the outside! You had to know this was going to happen! Calvin has pushed Press too far in recent weeks, and he's not out here to win. He's out here to cripple the man!
CAT: He can't do that, Percy!
PERCY: Who's going to stop him?!?!
Press, now on the outside, snatches Calvin, who was almost up to his feet, by the back of the head, and launches him back first into the steel guard rail. Calvin strikes and his back arches, mouth open in pain, but he doesn't get a rest, as Press already grabs him by the wrist and propels him into the steel cage across from them. Harris strikes the cage painfully, and then stumbles out in a haze before Press thunders in with a clothesline that causes him to cut a flip and land stomach first on the concrete. The fans are near pandemonium when the champion turns to face them, and beats his chest while roaring.
CAT: Somebody put that monster back in the cage, for Christ's sake, this isn't fair!
PERCY: Was it fair when The Power Trio beat the hell out of Press? Was it fair when they cost The BombTrax their first loss in fifteen years? Was it fair that they cost them a chance to be Tag Champs?
CAT: But...but...but this is different!
Press has Calvin back up again and walks him along the outside of the cage towards the announcers area, and when the two commentators notice this, their argument is cut abruptly short. Press slams Calvin's head off the announce booth, and without ever letting him go, drags him backwards to shove him into the steel cage. The back of his head hits one of the support beams, and he cradles his noggin in pain. Press grabs him by the head, and places his head between his legs, looking out at the crowd in satisfaction, before lifting him up onto his chest, and Press Release Powerbombing him down onto the announce booth. Calvin crunches against the surface, but the reinforced table doesn't break, leaving him there to writhe in agony. Press stares down at the broken man, shaking his head 'No' as he pulls him from the surface to try again. Just when Press is about hoist Calvin up one more time, The Martyr of Wrestling drops to both knee's, and drives his forearm up into his crotch. Press leans forward holding himself in shock and pain, before toppling down beside his nemesis, who falls back into a seated position against the announce booth, still smarting from all the damage that's been done.
CAT: THE GREAT EQUALIZER!
PERCY: I wouldn't get too comfortable yet, Cat! These two are still dangerously close, and I don't want to be anywhere around when they decide to finish off our table!
After a few seconds, both Calvin and Press begin climbing towards the steel cage to help pull themselves up. Once on their feet, Press makes a grab for Calvin, but the smaller man rushes towards the announce table, leaps up onto the announce table, and then bounds back at the champion, catching him right in the jaw with a vicious right hand. The momentum knocks the back of Press's head back into the steel cage, and he crumples, as Calvin stumbles around holding his aching back, looking for a weapon.
PERCY: That was a version of Meeting Kryptonite right there, and it's got Press off his feet. Oh No! Calvin has the ring bell, and he's just lying in wait off to the side of Press.
CAT: That's right. Ring that big bastards bell!
Press is slow to get back to his feet, but as soon as he is, Calvin comes rushing in with the Ring Bell aimed directly at the big man's head. Press, however, manages to sidestep the attempt, and when Calvin turns back to face him, he's met with a back elbow that forces him to drop the bell. Press pushes Calvin up against the cage, and rares way back with his right hand. He brings the fist forward, but Calvin manages to drop under him at the last second, and Press' fist strikes the steel instead. Press recoils back, shaking his hand, and trying to rub some feeling back into it. Meanwhile, Calvin looks up above him, and begins climbing the cage from the outside.
PERCY: What the hell is Calvin doing?
CAT: He's taking this match back inside the cage where it belongs, Percy! That's what a real champion would've done from the start.
PERCY: Well Calvin is about twelve feet above us now, halfway up the structure, and Press just noticed that his prey is making an escape!
Press reaches to try and grab Calvin's foot, but The Martyr of Wrestling Kicks at him, and continues to climb. Press, seeing no alternative, grabs hold of the steel mesh, and begins to climb as well. He moves much slower because of his bulk, and once he's midway up, Calvin is already swinging his legs over the top, and climbing down to stand on the top rope. Calvin starts shaking the cage furiously, forcing Press to hold on for dear life. He abandons this train of thought after a second, realizing that it's doing no good, and then drops down the rest of the way into the ring. He turns towards the door, and makes his way over there, when Press finally reaches the top.
PERCY: A-Ref is finally back on his feet, and he's trying to get Calvin Harris to stay in the ring. Calvin is arguing with him, and WHAT THE HELL! Calvin Harris just decked A-Ref!
CAT: Lay off of him, Percy. What business does A-Ref have telling Harris 'no'.
Harris searches through A-Ref's pockets until he finds what he's looking for, and despite his battered and beaten face, he grins out at the crowd as he holds the object up for all to see.
PERCY: Oh God!
CAT: That's the power relay! OH HELL YES!
Press has made it into the ring, and is standing tentatively on the top rope, still gripping the side of the cage, when Calvin Harris slips back into the ring. Press looks over his shoulder, and yells an insult at Harris, right as The Martyr of Wrestling pushes the button. 50 Watt's of electrical current hit the steel cage, and when it reaches the PAW Champion sparks fly as he is sent soaring into the air from the jolt that just ran through his body. He crashes to the mat, gyrating and convulsing, his hands smoking from the burns now on his palms. The smell of burnt flesh fills the arena, and everyone in attendance blanches, except for the man holding the controls. Calvin Harris wears a huge shit eating grin as he tosses the controls back out to the downed referee, and moves in on his opponent.
PERCY: That modulator is supposed to cycle the electricity on and off randomly, but apparently the initial start up causes it to go off, and Press is the first to feel it's effects! What am I saying? The bell hasn't even sounded on this match!
CAT: Maybe not, but Calvin has Press right where he wants him, and that's all that really matters.
Press moves to get to his knee's, his muscles still jerking from the electrocution. Harris meets him with a soccer like kick to the midsection that sends him back over onto his back, holding his ribs. From there, The Martyr of Wrestling begins laying the boots to the champion with abandon, forcing Press into a fetal position to try and block some of the strikes. The Ref appears on the stage, and power walks down the ramp to ringside, reaching the door and closing it shut and securing it. He then calls for the bell before turning to check on his brother, who is rubbing his jaw. The cage sparks up once more with electricity, one of it's intervals starting for an undisclosed amount of time.
PERCY: The cage is back to having electricity running through it, and Calvin Harris is looking around now. Looks like he's formulating a plan.
CAT: I can only imagine what vicious thoughts are running through the challengers mind at this moment. This is going to be awesome!
Harris plunges both hands into Press' hair, and jerks him to his feet so that he can look the big man in the eye. He starts mouthing off to him, the cameras on the outside unable to pick up the words, but it's obvious by his body language that it isn't pleasant. He retains one fistful of hair while he takes the other, and slaps Press right in the face, to which the fans react with a chorus of boo's. Finally, Calvin points at the cage, and with a running go, throws Press face first into the electrified steel.
PERCY: MY GOD! Press just struck the cage head first, and he's suspended there, convulsing like crazy. The smell of burnt flesh is filling the arena, God, this makes me sick.
CAT: It smells like victory, to me, Percy! And it's everything that Calvin Harris promised us and then some!
The sparks fly as Press finally dislodges himself from the side of the cage, and stumbles down to his knee's holding his smoking face. When the camera zooms in there are burn marks upon his forehead, and a patch of hair up front has been singed away. Blood oozes out of a laceration across his nose, and he pats at the area while wincing. Harris maneuvers in behind him, grabs both of his arms and pulls them back, and then places his boot in the center of the big man's back. He grins at everyone, before pushing down hard while releasing the arms, curb stomping Press face first into the canvas. Press rolls around the canvas clutching at his face, droplets of blood leaving a trail behind him.
PERCY: Calvin is relentless, and is already back on Press, getting him to his feet. He takes him by the hair of the head, and is running him back into the steel cage...NO! WAIT! Press got his boot up! He elbows Calvin in the bread basket, and now swings at him with a clothesli-Calvin ducks....leaps up to the ropes, and delivers a springboard flying knee that catches Press right in the jaw! Press thunders to the mat, and Calvin scrambles for a cover!
On the outside, The-Ref has in his hand a stick with a giant hand on it, and he slaps the side of the cage. The fans laugh, and count along with him.
1...
2...
PERCY: THRE-KICK OUT! Press is still in this thing, but for how long. With the way this all started, I thought it would be a short night for Calvin Harris, but the challenger has completely turned things around thanks to that electrified cage, and you have to wonder if that wasn't his plan all along?
CAT: Of coarse it was, Percy. Calvin Harris provoked the champion like no one else ever has, not even Stevie Harris, and got him all worked up so that he came down here like the mindless gorilla that he is and tried to destroy the man. Shit backfired when Calvin introduced the electricity though, a feature in this match that HE asked for. It's genius!
Calvin delivers a scathing comment to The-Ref outside the ring, and then starts pulling Press up to his feet and to the center of the ring. He hooks the man around the head while taking him by his left arm, and then swiftly rockets to the right, dropping the big man to the center of the ring with a rolling neck breaker. Press cradles his already injured head and neck, and Calvin sits up, looking out at the crowd with a satisfied expression while they heap on the hate. He gets to his feet, and looks over at the cage, which at some point has returned to normal. He nods, making his way over to the nearest corner, and begins to climb up to the top rope. He stands, perched on the top turnbuckle, and holds his arms out to either side of him, before leaping off and crashing down on Press with a breathtaking frog splash. He bounces off momentarily, holding his own rib cage, but quickly scrambles back over for a cover.
1...
2...
THRE-KICK OUT! At the very last second, Press barely rolls his shoulder up, and Calvin pops up and comes to the edge of the cage where he threatens The-Ref's life if he doesn't start swinging that stick faster.
PERCY: Calvin Harris showing signs of frustration here...
CAT: He has every right to be frustrated, Percy! That idiot is slow with the count!
PERCY: I didn't see any indication of that, but anyways. Calvin has decided it's time one way or the other to gain a victory, so he's going to try and climb the cage.
Just as Calvin steps over to the side of the cage, electricity suddenly sparks across the top, indicating that it has electrified once again. The fans all jeer and laugh at him, and he steps back with his hands on his hips, eyebrows raised at their reaction. That's when he reaches down into his boots, and pulls out a pair of heavy rubber gloves, causing the capacity crowd to fall in silence. He snidely laughs as he slips them on, and then safely grabs hold of the cage, and begins his climb.
PERCY: Are you kidding me? Of all the low down, under handed, bull shi....
CAT: You forgot genius, Percival! That man right there should run for office! He could fix this country!
PERCY: God, can you imagine, folks? We'd end up in World War 3 before he was ever sworn in.
As the two announcers bicker back and forth, Calvin has made it more than halfway up the side of the cage. He reaches up to grab hold of the top, and carefully begins to lift himself up, knowing that if he touches the cage, he'll be electrocuted. Down below, Press slowly stirs, but upon seeing Calvin starting to swing a leg gingerly over the top of the cage, he pushes himself to get back to his feet. He rushes the side of the cage, and throws his boot up, delivering a big boot to the steel mesh. The whole structure lurches, and Calvin grips the top for dear life, managing to keep any part of his exposed body from touching. This doesn't help him, however, when Press uses the bottom rope as a step stool, and latches on to the ankle that is still on this side of the cage. Harris looks down at the big man and shakes his head 'no' furiously, but all Press can do is smile, his burned and battered face looking like some sort of demon from a horror movie. With a yank downwards, Calvin's thigh hits the cage, and he cries out as he violently convulses. Eventually, in order to save himself from electrocution, he pushes himself back over the edge, and comes crashing down to the mat still in agony. Press steps down from the bottom rope, but is forced to a knee, fatigue from all that's happened evident on the big man's beleaguered body.
PERCY: Well, Calvin Harris doesn't look too much like a genius now, does he?
CAT: Shut up, Percy!
Calvin manages to roll himself to the other side of the ring, and uses the ropes to help pull himself up. He still twitches from time to time, but otherwise he finds his footing. He stares across the ring at his opponent, who gets to his feet and does the same. The two men eye each other for a moment, hatred apparent in their eyes. The crowd begins a chant to go along with what everyone else in the room is thinking.
CROWD: THIS IS AWESOME! THIS IS AWESOME! THIS IS AWESOME!
Neither man acknowledges the chant, but instead, they rush at one another in a flurry. Press swings hard for a clothesline, but Calvin ducks it, putting on the breaks to catch the big man with a boot when he turns around. He hooks Press around the head for a DDT, but the champion lifts up unexpectedly instead, sending Calvin up high into the air with a back body that drops him spine first to the canvas. Calvin pops back up clutching his back, more out of instinct than where-with-all, and walks right into Press' waiting arms. He lifts Calvin up into a back breaker position, but instead sits down abruptly in a side walk slam. He remains over Calvin for a pin, hooking the man's leg for good measure.
1...
2...
THRE-KICK OUT! Calvin manages to get his shoulder up, and Press rolls off of him, and gets back to his feet. He pulls Calvin up, and then hoists him up onto his shoulder. The fans come to their feet as he takes off in a sprint towards the side of the cage, but at the last second, puts on the brakes, sending Calvin like a lawn dart into the side of the steel. Fortunately for Harris, the electricity appears to be off, none-the-less the unforgiving structure has busted him wide open across the top of his head.
PERCY: Somehow Calvin Harris came out of that on his feet, but he just fell back into that corner, and he's a bloody mess! OH GOD! HERE COMES PRESS WITH A SPLASH!
CAT: CALVIN MOVED! He got out of the way! Press stumbling back now, and Calvin just spun him around, boot to the midsection....THIS IS IT!
PERCY: ART OF BETRAYAL! Calvin just hit his patented Package Pile Driver on Press, and this one is over if Calvin can somehow find the strength to cover the man.
CAT: Come on, Calvin!
Both men are laid out on the mat beaten and bloody messes, sucking in air to try and find the will to continue. As there is no count outs in this match, this goes on for quite a few seconds, but eventually it's Harris who slowly begins to roll, arm raised high into the air, until finally he limply falls over onto his stomach, his arm draped over the champion's chest.
1...
2...
THRE-NO! Press arm shoots off the mat at the last possible second, and both men lay there again for several seconds without moving. Finally Calvin pushes up to his knee's, beating his fist into the mat and shaking his head.
PERCY: These two men have put it all out there, and I don't know how they keep going, but they are.
CAT: SO you admit it! You admit that Calvin Harris deserves to be Champion!
PERCY: Cat, I admit that Calvin Harris is a tremendous competitor, and that if he leaves here tonight as Champion, I won't be surprised. But the same can be said of our current champion, and time and time again we've seen him miraculously come back from situations where we thought it was over. The only thing I know for sure, is that when this is all said and done, both of these men deserve our respect and our accolades, as this has been one hell of a ride from start to finish.
Calvin gets to his feet and starts stumbling his way towards the cage once more. Still wearing his gloves, he grabs the steel mesh, and looks up at the top before starting to climb once more. Meanwhile, Press has managed to get to a seating position, using the ropes to help hold him up. He watches as Calvin slowly makes his way up the side of the cage, before reaching up and grabbing the top rope to pull himself to his feet. He steps over and grabs Calvin by his ankle, but The Martyr of Wrestling kicks out at him, knocking his hands away, and hoisting himself up to the top. The steel is still not electrified, and upon realizing that, he lays there for a minute, before starting to swing his legs over the side. Press grabs the cage, and uses the ropes to climb halfway up, managing to grab a fist full of Calvin's hair before he can get himself completely over. He takes his other hand and grabs the top of the cage, using it to stabilize himself as he tentatively uses the steel mesh to push him up to a greater height. Calvin begins to hammer right hands down into the big man's head, each blow rocking Press' head back, but also pulling Harris further back into the interior. A loud sparking noise emits from the other side of the cage, and both men look up at each other with wide eyes right about the time that the electricity completes it's circuit, and shoots through both superstars. The men convulse wildly, Calvin laid across the top, Press hanging from the side, before both fall helplessly to the mat below. They crash awkwardly, their bodies seizing as the fans come to their feet open mouthed.
PERCY: GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY! These two might be dead. A fall from that height is bad enough, but they just had 50 Watt's run through them to boot.
CAT: I....I can't believe I'm saying this, but somebody might ought to stop this match.
PERCY: I think I agree with you.
The two men lay on the canvas for long moments, trying to regain some control over their motor functions. Finally, Press rolls over onto his stomach, and crawls for the ropes to assist him in getting to his feet. Calvin begins to stir as well, and pushes up to one knee. Press, now vertical but shaky, starts towards Calvin, but when he reaches down to grab the man, he's met with a hard forearm to his midsection. This gives him pause, but he moves in once more, only to receive another forearm to the midsection. Press abandons Calvin for a second, holding his midsection, which gives Harris a chance to get fully to his feet. He moves in on the big man, leaping up onto his back and wrapping his arms around his throat for a rear naked choke. Press struggles, moving around the ring sluggishly with fatigue and the extra weight wearing him down. Just when it looks like he is about to succumb to the hold, he grabs Calvin's legs, pulls them up on either side of his body, and runs backwards to crush the challenger against the steel cage. Luckily, the cage wasn't electrified, but that still doesn't take away from the impact, as Harris slumps down to sit on the middle rope. Press stumbles forwards to the other side of the ring, falling across the top rope to keep him up. He turns to look back at his opponent, who still sits in the same spot. Without warning, the big man charges at the propped man, rushing in for a big splash. Calvin, however, slips out of the way to avoid the impact. Press, unable to put on the brakes, throws his boot out to stop his momentum. He spins back around to face The Martyr of Wrestling, who is unaware that Press didn't collide with the steel, and rushes at Harris once more. Calvin manages to look up, just as Press throws his boot forward, damn near taking the mans head off.
PERCY: SUDDEN STOP! GOOD GOD! Calvin Harris might be unconscious!
CAT: Please, if there is a god, we've already seen two black and white clowns become Tag Team Champions. Don't let this gorilla retain!
Press, a little woozy from the sudden bursts of speed, falls to his knee's, and drapes his bulk across Harris for the cover.
1...
2...
THRE-KICK OUT! Calvin's arm thrusts into the air at the last possible second, much like Press' had earlier, and the big man rolls off of him bringing his hands up to his face in disbelief.
PERCY: Press can't believe it, and quite frankly neither can I! I was sure he had him there.
CAT: Thank God! I was almost doubting myself.
Press finally sits up, looking over at Calvin with a mixture of emotions, before getting to his feet. He stares down at the man for awhile, until he looks up with wide eyes, like a thunderbolt had just went off in his brain. He reaches down to grab Calvin by the arms, and peels the heavy rubber gloves from the man's hands before slipping them onto his own. They don't fit exactly, but they would do the job. He stalks over to the cage, which isn't electrified at this moment, and uses the ropes to aide in getting him halfway up the side. He reaches up and grips the top, and begins to haul the rest of him up there, when Calvin Harris sits up in the center of the ring. He's already moving to get to his feet when Press swings his first leg over, and is now sitting on the edge. The Martyr of Wrestling literally takes off in a sprint and leaps up to the top rope, grabbing hold of the cage for support, before trying to make a grab at Press' dangling limb. He grabs hold, managing to unsettle the big man, who grips the top of the cage with both hands. The Champion begins to kick at Harris, who bares the brunt of the attacks in order to retain his hold, but with a sudden burst of speed, Press swings the leg back while leaning forward, and slips it right over the top of the cage.
PERCY: Press has got his lower half on the other side of the cage now, and he's making his way down! Calvin better hurry if he hopes to stop him!
CAT: Come on Calvin!
Calvin grabs at the top of the cage, and springs off the top rope to come up on his stomach, and come to a seated position much like Press was. He reaches down with one hand to grab a handful of the big man's hair, while grabbing with the other hand to hook him under his massive arm. He pulls with all his might, and actually starts to force the big man back up the side of the cage towards the top. Press' free hand shoots up and snatches Harris around the throat, while he continues to hold on with dear life with the other. Calvin spits and tries to breathe, as Press squeezes with everything he has on the mans trachea. Calvin's strength begins to fade, and first he lets loose of the big man's hair, and then the other arm goes limp freeing him completely. Press gives him a shove backwards, but Calvin doesn't fall, instead grabbing the top of the cage with one hand. Unfortunately he slips to one side, and not the side that he wants to be on, and he finds himself hanging onto the top from the interior of the cage. Press, now with both hands, continues to slowly make his way down, while Calvin scrambles to get back up to the top. Suddenly, a popping sound from the other side of the ring near the power relay booms out, and Calvin looks over to see sparks flying, the current running along the cage. He's forced to release the cage, and makes a desperate leap down to the ring, landing on his feet. He whirls around to see Press hanging his body away from the cage, the rubber on the soles of his boot and the gloves that Calvin brought with him keeping him safe from the electricity.
PERCY: Are you seeing this!
CAT: No! I can't look!
Press lowers all the way to eye level with Calvin, who if looks could kill, would have murdered the PAW Heavyweight Champion at that moment. He beat his chest, and yelled into the big man's face, but Press shook his head, and put one boot down on the ground, followed by the other. Calvin kicked at the bottom rope, almost beside himself with rage, slumping to his knee's fuming.
RHONDA ARMSTRONG: The winner of this match, and STILL PAW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION....PRESS!!!
The big man falls back against the announce table, allowing it to help keep him upright as every muscle in his body screams for rest. His face is still black from the electrocution, but the blood has finally started to slow. A-Ref presents him with his belt, while The Ref lifts his arm in victory. Press winces from the motion, and pulls his arm down, clutching at the belt that he had carried for so long now. He gave one final look at Calvin, who remained in the center of the ring with his head hung low, before making his way around the outside to the ramp.
PERCY: I'm going to tell you right now, the man in the ring did an outstanding job. He has nothing to be ashamed of here, and there were so many times we thought this thing was over with him the winner. But in the end, those rubber gloves backfired on him, and gave Press what he needed to take home the gold.
CAT: I just don't have the words, Percy. I thought there'd be a huge celebration in the back, fireworks, champagne. Harris has been so unstoppable, I just didn't believe he could be beaten.
PERCY: Every man has his day, and I for one hope to see these two go at it again in the near future, but right now it looks like they could do with some medical attention.
Press reaches the stage area, and doesn't even have the strength to give his usual fanfare after a huge win. He turns back around with a stumble in front of the curtain, and points out at the crowd, slapping his chest, and holds out the championship. The fans explode in cheers, until the lights suddenly go out. The big screen behind the big man lights up, and a mask appears on the screen, drawing everyone's attention.
PERCY: What the hell is this?
CAT: Do I recognize that mask?
The lights suddenly come on, and Press continues staring up at the screen, a confused look spread across his face. The crowd reacts to something, and he looks from side to side, unsure of what they are going so crazy for.
PERCY: OH MY GOD!
CAT: IS...IS THAT......
PERCY: DEUS! DEUS IS STANDING RIGHT BEHIND THE PAW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION!
Press finally clues in that whatever has the crowd on edge is back in the ring, and he turns around expecting to see Calvin Harris barreling up the ramp after him. Instead, he finds a person, non-descript in their gender, wearing a solid black jump suit, and a full black mask with an almost roman design around the brow, that streak down the sides like a helmet. Press cocks his head to the side in confusion, and takes a step forward, just as Deus' hand flashes out in front to strike the champion in the face. Press drops like a sack of potatoes, and Deus lifts the black glove, adjusting it with the other hand to pull it tight. The camera zooms in, and brass knuckles can be seen along the fingers.
PERCY: Oh no.....this is a repeat of what happened nearly 10 months ago when The BombTrax first made their return to main stream wrestling in EW! They came out and attacked Deus after her championship match, and he was never seen again!
CAT: How do you know it was a he? I heard it was a her!
PERCY: EITHER WAY SHIT'S ABOUT TO GET BAD!
Deus drops down to straddle the PAW champion's chest, and with one hand cradles his head tenderly, while raising the fist with brass knuckles high above her head. The fist drops like a bomb down into Press' forehead, and continue like the pistons on an engine, until the blows go from a hard thudding sound to a wet packing sound. Blood splatters every which way, and the fists keep reigning down until finally they come to a sudden stop. Rising in one fluid motion, Deus takes a step back, and the lights drop. Screams can be heard throughout the arena, phones flashing all over the place, until as quickly as they had went out, they came back on.
PERCY: Oh God....someone get out here.
CAT: I...
At the top of the ramp, Press is sitting his famed 'Press Pass' chair, his head tilted forward for all to see. His face is nearly unrecognizable from all of the blood, and his arms hang limply at his side. Calvin Harris, who has finally exited the ring, looks up at the scene with hands on his hips, and then shrugs with a laugh, before walking beside the ramp to the back through the bottom exit. The screen flickers on behind the seated mess of flesh that is Press, and everyone's eyes are drawn to the unfolding story backstage.
CAT: I don't know, but this whole god damn show has given me one anxiety attack after another. First with that fucking bear, and now GIANT SPIDERS!?! What the hell?
PERCY: Well, maybe this springboard back to violence will help alleviate your worries, cause it's Main Event time! Calvin Harris has consistently goaded and one upped the PAW Champion, Press, in the past few shows, but you've gotta believe one on one, with no interference thanks to an electrified steel cage, Press is going to get himself some retribution!
CAT: Are you kidding me, Percival? Calvin Harris has been claiming to be the real deal from the start, and despite nay-sayers like 'YOU', he's done more than prove that he should be the next PAW Champion.
PERCY: Yeah, everything but actually become the champion.
CAT: You know...Percy, I hope you're paying attention, cause you're going to eat those words after this is over. Rhonda, take it away!
RHONDA ARMSTRONG: Ladies and Gentleman, this is your Main Event of the evening, and is an Electrified Steel Cage Match for the PAW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP! Both competitors will be locked within the structure, and then 50 watts will be run through the cage at random intervals. The only way to win is by pinfall, submission, or escaping the cage.
Bullet For My Valentine's "Your Betrayal" hits over the arena's speakers, the guitar riff kicking it all off, and the boo's coming instantaneously. Out of the curtain steps Calvin Harris, his eyes scanning the packed out house of jeering fans with a smug smirk on his lips. The boo's intensify, if that were even possible, as Calvin rolls his head around with his neck, and then looks straight ahead at the ring. The smirk never leaves his face as he stretches both arms out to either side of him, nodding as the fans poured on the hate as if it were fueling him. After a few moments he lowered his arms back down at his side and begins to slowly make his way down the ramp.
RHONDA ARMSTRONG: Introducing first the challenger, from Chicago, Illinois. Weighing in at 227 pounds. Representing the Power Trio, he is the #1 Contender, The Martyr of Pro Wrestling. . . CALVIN HARRIS!
Calvin continues his confident saunter down to ringside, and if the crowd's reaction bothers him, he doesn't show it at all. He stops once he reaches the bottom of the ramp, and stares up at the steel structure around the ring, seeming to be satisfied with it's design. He steps around the cage until reaching the steps leading up to the single door entry, and he climbs up onto the ring apron, and then swings into the ring through the ropes. He grabs the cage and shakes it, knowing that in a few short minutes it would be electrified, and he cockily laughs before climbing up on the nearest corner. Again he stares at the crowd who has such venom for him, and again he throws his arms out at his sides, just taunting them for no other reason that there wasn't anything they could do about it. Finally, he drops down from the corner, and stretches along the ropes, watching the entrance where his opponent will be.
PERCY: Calvin looks more than ready for this experience, Cat, and now that this match is a reality, I think the champion may just have met his match.
CAT: You say that like it's the first time anyone's ever said it, Percy. Calvin Harris has done everything he needed to do in the past few months to undermine the champion, leave him and his partner laying, and this steel cage is the final nail in the coffin of Press' championship reign, if not his career.
PERCY: You know, Cat, everything you're saying is true, but the more you build this guy, the more I want Press to cram it down his throat.
CAT: Well then you'll be crying along with everyone else, cause Harris is going to deliver on his promises.
The lights go dim as "Strangle Hold" begins to blare across the arena, and the fans pull a complete 180, the cheers nearly drowning out the music. Red strobe-lights begin to flicker all around the ring and ramp way, and finally settle on the entry way where the silhouette of the massive Press can be seen standing in the curtain. These words can be seen clearly up on the four small screens.
WITH THIS PASS
I CAN GO ANYWHERE I DAMN WELL PLEASE!
As soon as the words begin the figure moves out into the lights, the PAW Heavyweight Championship dangling from his right hand, a steel chair with the words 'Press Pass' written across the seat in the other. He stares straight down at the ring, his face stoic and etched in stone. The hand holding the championship slowly rises into the air and the fans go completely berserk, while the lights suddenly come back to full.
RHONDA ARMSTRONG: And his opponent, hailing from New Orleans, Louisiana, and standing at 6 foot 10, and weighting in at 365 pounds, representing one half of The BombTrax, he is the PAW Heavyweight Champion, PRESS!
The Championship drops to his side and he stalks down the ramp without anymore bravado. When he reaches ringside, he tosses the chair to the floor, and hands the belt to A-Ref before climbing the steps and entering the ring. Calvin Harris rushes in to meet him, but Press doesn't give him the chance before catching with a right hand that sends him down to the mat. Harris bounces up quickly, and he's thundered back down with another right. One more time Harris comes to his feet, and this time Press takes him by the hair of the head and rushes him head long into the steel door that A-Ref is desperately trying to latch. The door flies open on impact, tangling Calvin up in the ropes, and striking A-Ref which sends him sailing into the steel guard rail at ringside, while the championship he was holding skitters across the cement floor. Calvin scrambles to get untangled as Press wades in, contempt clear upon his face. Just as Calvin gets himself unhooked, Press comes in with a double axe handle down across Calvin's shoulders which hammer through the ropes and out onto the steps. Before he can get too far, Press grabs him by the hair of the head, and rams him face first into the door jam. Calvin falls off of the steel steps down to the concrete, and the big man steps through the ropes to come out after him.
PERCY: GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY THE BELL HASN'T EVEN RUNG!
CAT: Get that cheater back into the cage!
PERCY: Who, Cat? A-Ref's still laid out on the outside! You had to know this was going to happen! Calvin has pushed Press too far in recent weeks, and he's not out here to win. He's out here to cripple the man!
CAT: He can't do that, Percy!
PERCY: Who's going to stop him?!?!
Press, now on the outside, snatches Calvin, who was almost up to his feet, by the back of the head, and launches him back first into the steel guard rail. Calvin strikes and his back arches, mouth open in pain, but he doesn't get a rest, as Press already grabs him by the wrist and propels him into the steel cage across from them. Harris strikes the cage painfully, and then stumbles out in a haze before Press thunders in with a clothesline that causes him to cut a flip and land stomach first on the concrete. The fans are near pandemonium when the champion turns to face them, and beats his chest while roaring.
CAT: Somebody put that monster back in the cage, for Christ's sake, this isn't fair!
PERCY: Was it fair when The Power Trio beat the hell out of Press? Was it fair when they cost The BombTrax their first loss in fifteen years? Was it fair that they cost them a chance to be Tag Champs?
CAT: But...but...but this is different!
Press has Calvin back up again and walks him along the outside of the cage towards the announcers area, and when the two commentators notice this, their argument is cut abruptly short. Press slams Calvin's head off the announce booth, and without ever letting him go, drags him backwards to shove him into the steel cage. The back of his head hits one of the support beams, and he cradles his noggin in pain. Press grabs him by the head, and places his head between his legs, looking out at the crowd in satisfaction, before lifting him up onto his chest, and Press Release Powerbombing him down onto the announce booth. Calvin crunches against the surface, but the reinforced table doesn't break, leaving him there to writhe in agony. Press stares down at the broken man, shaking his head 'No' as he pulls him from the surface to try again. Just when Press is about hoist Calvin up one more time, The Martyr of Wrestling drops to both knee's, and drives his forearm up into his crotch. Press leans forward holding himself in shock and pain, before toppling down beside his nemesis, who falls back into a seated position against the announce booth, still smarting from all the damage that's been done.
CAT: THE GREAT EQUALIZER!
PERCY: I wouldn't get too comfortable yet, Cat! These two are still dangerously close, and I don't want to be anywhere around when they decide to finish off our table!
After a few seconds, both Calvin and Press begin climbing towards the steel cage to help pull themselves up. Once on their feet, Press makes a grab for Calvin, but the smaller man rushes towards the announce table, leaps up onto the announce table, and then bounds back at the champion, catching him right in the jaw with a vicious right hand. The momentum knocks the back of Press's head back into the steel cage, and he crumples, as Calvin stumbles around holding his aching back, looking for a weapon.
PERCY: That was a version of Meeting Kryptonite right there, and it's got Press off his feet. Oh No! Calvin has the ring bell, and he's just lying in wait off to the side of Press.
CAT: That's right. Ring that big bastards bell!
Press is slow to get back to his feet, but as soon as he is, Calvin comes rushing in with the Ring Bell aimed directly at the big man's head. Press, however, manages to sidestep the attempt, and when Calvin turns back to face him, he's met with a back elbow that forces him to drop the bell. Press pushes Calvin up against the cage, and rares way back with his right hand. He brings the fist forward, but Calvin manages to drop under him at the last second, and Press' fist strikes the steel instead. Press recoils back, shaking his hand, and trying to rub some feeling back into it. Meanwhile, Calvin looks up above him, and begins climbing the cage from the outside.
PERCY: What the hell is Calvin doing?
CAT: He's taking this match back inside the cage where it belongs, Percy! That's what a real champion would've done from the start.
PERCY: Well Calvin is about twelve feet above us now, halfway up the structure, and Press just noticed that his prey is making an escape!
Press reaches to try and grab Calvin's foot, but The Martyr of Wrestling Kicks at him, and continues to climb. Press, seeing no alternative, grabs hold of the steel mesh, and begins to climb as well. He moves much slower because of his bulk, and once he's midway up, Calvin is already swinging his legs over the top, and climbing down to stand on the top rope. Calvin starts shaking the cage furiously, forcing Press to hold on for dear life. He abandons this train of thought after a second, realizing that it's doing no good, and then drops down the rest of the way into the ring. He turns towards the door, and makes his way over there, when Press finally reaches the top.
PERCY: A-Ref is finally back on his feet, and he's trying to get Calvin Harris to stay in the ring. Calvin is arguing with him, and WHAT THE HELL! Calvin Harris just decked A-Ref!
CAT: Lay off of him, Percy. What business does A-Ref have telling Harris 'no'.
Harris searches through A-Ref's pockets until he finds what he's looking for, and despite his battered and beaten face, he grins out at the crowd as he holds the object up for all to see.
PERCY: Oh God!
CAT: That's the power relay! OH HELL YES!
Press has made it into the ring, and is standing tentatively on the top rope, still gripping the side of the cage, when Calvin Harris slips back into the ring. Press looks over his shoulder, and yells an insult at Harris, right as The Martyr of Wrestling pushes the button. 50 Watt's of electrical current hit the steel cage, and when it reaches the PAW Champion sparks fly as he is sent soaring into the air from the jolt that just ran through his body. He crashes to the mat, gyrating and convulsing, his hands smoking from the burns now on his palms. The smell of burnt flesh fills the arena, and everyone in attendance blanches, except for the man holding the controls. Calvin Harris wears a huge shit eating grin as he tosses the controls back out to the downed referee, and moves in on his opponent.
PERCY: That modulator is supposed to cycle the electricity on and off randomly, but apparently the initial start up causes it to go off, and Press is the first to feel it's effects! What am I saying? The bell hasn't even sounded on this match!
CAT: Maybe not, but Calvin has Press right where he wants him, and that's all that really matters.
Press moves to get to his knee's, his muscles still jerking from the electrocution. Harris meets him with a soccer like kick to the midsection that sends him back over onto his back, holding his ribs. From there, The Martyr of Wrestling begins laying the boots to the champion with abandon, forcing Press into a fetal position to try and block some of the strikes. The Ref appears on the stage, and power walks down the ramp to ringside, reaching the door and closing it shut and securing it. He then calls for the bell before turning to check on his brother, who is rubbing his jaw. The cage sparks up once more with electricity, one of it's intervals starting for an undisclosed amount of time.
PERCY: The cage is back to having electricity running through it, and Calvin Harris is looking around now. Looks like he's formulating a plan.
CAT: I can only imagine what vicious thoughts are running through the challengers mind at this moment. This is going to be awesome!
Harris plunges both hands into Press' hair, and jerks him to his feet so that he can look the big man in the eye. He starts mouthing off to him, the cameras on the outside unable to pick up the words, but it's obvious by his body language that it isn't pleasant. He retains one fistful of hair while he takes the other, and slaps Press right in the face, to which the fans react with a chorus of boo's. Finally, Calvin points at the cage, and with a running go, throws Press face first into the electrified steel.
PERCY: MY GOD! Press just struck the cage head first, and he's suspended there, convulsing like crazy. The smell of burnt flesh is filling the arena, God, this makes me sick.
CAT: It smells like victory, to me, Percy! And it's everything that Calvin Harris promised us and then some!
The sparks fly as Press finally dislodges himself from the side of the cage, and stumbles down to his knee's holding his smoking face. When the camera zooms in there are burn marks upon his forehead, and a patch of hair up front has been singed away. Blood oozes out of a laceration across his nose, and he pats at the area while wincing. Harris maneuvers in behind him, grabs both of his arms and pulls them back, and then places his boot in the center of the big man's back. He grins at everyone, before pushing down hard while releasing the arms, curb stomping Press face first into the canvas. Press rolls around the canvas clutching at his face, droplets of blood leaving a trail behind him.
PERCY: Calvin is relentless, and is already back on Press, getting him to his feet. He takes him by the hair of the head, and is running him back into the steel cage...NO! WAIT! Press got his boot up! He elbows Calvin in the bread basket, and now swings at him with a clothesli-Calvin ducks....leaps up to the ropes, and delivers a springboard flying knee that catches Press right in the jaw! Press thunders to the mat, and Calvin scrambles for a cover!
On the outside, The-Ref has in his hand a stick with a giant hand on it, and he slaps the side of the cage. The fans laugh, and count along with him.
1...
2...
PERCY: THRE-KICK OUT! Press is still in this thing, but for how long. With the way this all started, I thought it would be a short night for Calvin Harris, but the challenger has completely turned things around thanks to that electrified cage, and you have to wonder if that wasn't his plan all along?
CAT: Of coarse it was, Percy. Calvin Harris provoked the champion like no one else ever has, not even Stevie Harris, and got him all worked up so that he came down here like the mindless gorilla that he is and tried to destroy the man. Shit backfired when Calvin introduced the electricity though, a feature in this match that HE asked for. It's genius!
Calvin delivers a scathing comment to The-Ref outside the ring, and then starts pulling Press up to his feet and to the center of the ring. He hooks the man around the head while taking him by his left arm, and then swiftly rockets to the right, dropping the big man to the center of the ring with a rolling neck breaker. Press cradles his already injured head and neck, and Calvin sits up, looking out at the crowd with a satisfied expression while they heap on the hate. He gets to his feet, and looks over at the cage, which at some point has returned to normal. He nods, making his way over to the nearest corner, and begins to climb up to the top rope. He stands, perched on the top turnbuckle, and holds his arms out to either side of him, before leaping off and crashing down on Press with a breathtaking frog splash. He bounces off momentarily, holding his own rib cage, but quickly scrambles back over for a cover.
1...
2...
THRE-KICK OUT! At the very last second, Press barely rolls his shoulder up, and Calvin pops up and comes to the edge of the cage where he threatens The-Ref's life if he doesn't start swinging that stick faster.
PERCY: Calvin Harris showing signs of frustration here...
CAT: He has every right to be frustrated, Percy! That idiot is slow with the count!
PERCY: I didn't see any indication of that, but anyways. Calvin has decided it's time one way or the other to gain a victory, so he's going to try and climb the cage.
Just as Calvin steps over to the side of the cage, electricity suddenly sparks across the top, indicating that it has electrified once again. The fans all jeer and laugh at him, and he steps back with his hands on his hips, eyebrows raised at their reaction. That's when he reaches down into his boots, and pulls out a pair of heavy rubber gloves, causing the capacity crowd to fall in silence. He snidely laughs as he slips them on, and then safely grabs hold of the cage, and begins his climb.
PERCY: Are you kidding me? Of all the low down, under handed, bull shi....
CAT: You forgot genius, Percival! That man right there should run for office! He could fix this country!
PERCY: God, can you imagine, folks? We'd end up in World War 3 before he was ever sworn in.
As the two announcers bicker back and forth, Calvin has made it more than halfway up the side of the cage. He reaches up to grab hold of the top, and carefully begins to lift himself up, knowing that if he touches the cage, he'll be electrocuted. Down below, Press slowly stirs, but upon seeing Calvin starting to swing a leg gingerly over the top of the cage, he pushes himself to get back to his feet. He rushes the side of the cage, and throws his boot up, delivering a big boot to the steel mesh. The whole structure lurches, and Calvin grips the top for dear life, managing to keep any part of his exposed body from touching. This doesn't help him, however, when Press uses the bottom rope as a step stool, and latches on to the ankle that is still on this side of the cage. Harris looks down at the big man and shakes his head 'no' furiously, but all Press can do is smile, his burned and battered face looking like some sort of demon from a horror movie. With a yank downwards, Calvin's thigh hits the cage, and he cries out as he violently convulses. Eventually, in order to save himself from electrocution, he pushes himself back over the edge, and comes crashing down to the mat still in agony. Press steps down from the bottom rope, but is forced to a knee, fatigue from all that's happened evident on the big man's beleaguered body.
PERCY: Well, Calvin Harris doesn't look too much like a genius now, does he?
CAT: Shut up, Percy!
Calvin manages to roll himself to the other side of the ring, and uses the ropes to help pull himself up. He still twitches from time to time, but otherwise he finds his footing. He stares across the ring at his opponent, who gets to his feet and does the same. The two men eye each other for a moment, hatred apparent in their eyes. The crowd begins a chant to go along with what everyone else in the room is thinking.
CROWD: THIS IS AWESOME! THIS IS AWESOME! THIS IS AWESOME!
Neither man acknowledges the chant, but instead, they rush at one another in a flurry. Press swings hard for a clothesline, but Calvin ducks it, putting on the breaks to catch the big man with a boot when he turns around. He hooks Press around the head for a DDT, but the champion lifts up unexpectedly instead, sending Calvin up high into the air with a back body that drops him spine first to the canvas. Calvin pops back up clutching his back, more out of instinct than where-with-all, and walks right into Press' waiting arms. He lifts Calvin up into a back breaker position, but instead sits down abruptly in a side walk slam. He remains over Calvin for a pin, hooking the man's leg for good measure.
1...
2...
THRE-KICK OUT! Calvin manages to get his shoulder up, and Press rolls off of him, and gets back to his feet. He pulls Calvin up, and then hoists him up onto his shoulder. The fans come to their feet as he takes off in a sprint towards the side of the cage, but at the last second, puts on the brakes, sending Calvin like a lawn dart into the side of the steel. Fortunately for Harris, the electricity appears to be off, none-the-less the unforgiving structure has busted him wide open across the top of his head.
PERCY: Somehow Calvin Harris came out of that on his feet, but he just fell back into that corner, and he's a bloody mess! OH GOD! HERE COMES PRESS WITH A SPLASH!
CAT: CALVIN MOVED! He got out of the way! Press stumbling back now, and Calvin just spun him around, boot to the midsection....THIS IS IT!
PERCY: ART OF BETRAYAL! Calvin just hit his patented Package Pile Driver on Press, and this one is over if Calvin can somehow find the strength to cover the man.
CAT: Come on, Calvin!
Both men are laid out on the mat beaten and bloody messes, sucking in air to try and find the will to continue. As there is no count outs in this match, this goes on for quite a few seconds, but eventually it's Harris who slowly begins to roll, arm raised high into the air, until finally he limply falls over onto his stomach, his arm draped over the champion's chest.
1...
2...
THRE-NO! Press arm shoots off the mat at the last possible second, and both men lay there again for several seconds without moving. Finally Calvin pushes up to his knee's, beating his fist into the mat and shaking his head.
PERCY: These two men have put it all out there, and I don't know how they keep going, but they are.
CAT: SO you admit it! You admit that Calvin Harris deserves to be Champion!
PERCY: Cat, I admit that Calvin Harris is a tremendous competitor, and that if he leaves here tonight as Champion, I won't be surprised. But the same can be said of our current champion, and time and time again we've seen him miraculously come back from situations where we thought it was over. The only thing I know for sure, is that when this is all said and done, both of these men deserve our respect and our accolades, as this has been one hell of a ride from start to finish.
Calvin gets to his feet and starts stumbling his way towards the cage once more. Still wearing his gloves, he grabs the steel mesh, and looks up at the top before starting to climb once more. Meanwhile, Press has managed to get to a seating position, using the ropes to help hold him up. He watches as Calvin slowly makes his way up the side of the cage, before reaching up and grabbing the top rope to pull himself to his feet. He steps over and grabs Calvin by his ankle, but The Martyr of Wrestling kicks out at him, knocking his hands away, and hoisting himself up to the top. The steel is still not electrified, and upon realizing that, he lays there for a minute, before starting to swing his legs over the side. Press grabs the cage, and uses the ropes to climb halfway up, managing to grab a fist full of Calvin's hair before he can get himself completely over. He takes his other hand and grabs the top of the cage, using it to stabilize himself as he tentatively uses the steel mesh to push him up to a greater height. Calvin begins to hammer right hands down into the big man's head, each blow rocking Press' head back, but also pulling Harris further back into the interior. A loud sparking noise emits from the other side of the cage, and both men look up at each other with wide eyes right about the time that the electricity completes it's circuit, and shoots through both superstars. The men convulse wildly, Calvin laid across the top, Press hanging from the side, before both fall helplessly to the mat below. They crash awkwardly, their bodies seizing as the fans come to their feet open mouthed.
PERCY: GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY! These two might be dead. A fall from that height is bad enough, but they just had 50 Watt's run through them to boot.
CAT: I....I can't believe I'm saying this, but somebody might ought to stop this match.
PERCY: I think I agree with you.
The two men lay on the canvas for long moments, trying to regain some control over their motor functions. Finally, Press rolls over onto his stomach, and crawls for the ropes to assist him in getting to his feet. Calvin begins to stir as well, and pushes up to one knee. Press, now vertical but shaky, starts towards Calvin, but when he reaches down to grab the man, he's met with a hard forearm to his midsection. This gives him pause, but he moves in once more, only to receive another forearm to the midsection. Press abandons Calvin for a second, holding his midsection, which gives Harris a chance to get fully to his feet. He moves in on the big man, leaping up onto his back and wrapping his arms around his throat for a rear naked choke. Press struggles, moving around the ring sluggishly with fatigue and the extra weight wearing him down. Just when it looks like he is about to succumb to the hold, he grabs Calvin's legs, pulls them up on either side of his body, and runs backwards to crush the challenger against the steel cage. Luckily, the cage wasn't electrified, but that still doesn't take away from the impact, as Harris slumps down to sit on the middle rope. Press stumbles forwards to the other side of the ring, falling across the top rope to keep him up. He turns to look back at his opponent, who still sits in the same spot. Without warning, the big man charges at the propped man, rushing in for a big splash. Calvin, however, slips out of the way to avoid the impact. Press, unable to put on the brakes, throws his boot out to stop his momentum. He spins back around to face The Martyr of Wrestling, who is unaware that Press didn't collide with the steel, and rushes at Harris once more. Calvin manages to look up, just as Press throws his boot forward, damn near taking the mans head off.
PERCY: SUDDEN STOP! GOOD GOD! Calvin Harris might be unconscious!
CAT: Please, if there is a god, we've already seen two black and white clowns become Tag Team Champions. Don't let this gorilla retain!
Press, a little woozy from the sudden bursts of speed, falls to his knee's, and drapes his bulk across Harris for the cover.
1...
2...
THRE-KICK OUT! Calvin's arm thrusts into the air at the last possible second, much like Press' had earlier, and the big man rolls off of him bringing his hands up to his face in disbelief.
PERCY: Press can't believe it, and quite frankly neither can I! I was sure he had him there.
CAT: Thank God! I was almost doubting myself.
Press finally sits up, looking over at Calvin with a mixture of emotions, before getting to his feet. He stares down at the man for awhile, until he looks up with wide eyes, like a thunderbolt had just went off in his brain. He reaches down to grab Calvin by the arms, and peels the heavy rubber gloves from the man's hands before slipping them onto his own. They don't fit exactly, but they would do the job. He stalks over to the cage, which isn't electrified at this moment, and uses the ropes to aide in getting him halfway up the side. He reaches up and grips the top, and begins to haul the rest of him up there, when Calvin Harris sits up in the center of the ring. He's already moving to get to his feet when Press swings his first leg over, and is now sitting on the edge. The Martyr of Wrestling literally takes off in a sprint and leaps up to the top rope, grabbing hold of the cage for support, before trying to make a grab at Press' dangling limb. He grabs hold, managing to unsettle the big man, who grips the top of the cage with both hands. The Champion begins to kick at Harris, who bares the brunt of the attacks in order to retain his hold, but with a sudden burst of speed, Press swings the leg back while leaning forward, and slips it right over the top of the cage.
PERCY: Press has got his lower half on the other side of the cage now, and he's making his way down! Calvin better hurry if he hopes to stop him!
CAT: Come on Calvin!
Calvin grabs at the top of the cage, and springs off the top rope to come up on his stomach, and come to a seated position much like Press was. He reaches down with one hand to grab a handful of the big man's hair, while grabbing with the other hand to hook him under his massive arm. He pulls with all his might, and actually starts to force the big man back up the side of the cage towards the top. Press' free hand shoots up and snatches Harris around the throat, while he continues to hold on with dear life with the other. Calvin spits and tries to breathe, as Press squeezes with everything he has on the mans trachea. Calvin's strength begins to fade, and first he lets loose of the big man's hair, and then the other arm goes limp freeing him completely. Press gives him a shove backwards, but Calvin doesn't fall, instead grabbing the top of the cage with one hand. Unfortunately he slips to one side, and not the side that he wants to be on, and he finds himself hanging onto the top from the interior of the cage. Press, now with both hands, continues to slowly make his way down, while Calvin scrambles to get back up to the top. Suddenly, a popping sound from the other side of the ring near the power relay booms out, and Calvin looks over to see sparks flying, the current running along the cage. He's forced to release the cage, and makes a desperate leap down to the ring, landing on his feet. He whirls around to see Press hanging his body away from the cage, the rubber on the soles of his boot and the gloves that Calvin brought with him keeping him safe from the electricity.
PERCY: Are you seeing this!
CAT: No! I can't look!
Press lowers all the way to eye level with Calvin, who if looks could kill, would have murdered the PAW Heavyweight Champion at that moment. He beat his chest, and yelled into the big man's face, but Press shook his head, and put one boot down on the ground, followed by the other. Calvin kicked at the bottom rope, almost beside himself with rage, slumping to his knee's fuming.
RHONDA ARMSTRONG: The winner of this match, and STILL PAW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION....PRESS!!!
The big man falls back against the announce table, allowing it to help keep him upright as every muscle in his body screams for rest. His face is still black from the electrocution, but the blood has finally started to slow. A-Ref presents him with his belt, while The Ref lifts his arm in victory. Press winces from the motion, and pulls his arm down, clutching at the belt that he had carried for so long now. He gave one final look at Calvin, who remained in the center of the ring with his head hung low, before making his way around the outside to the ramp.
PERCY: I'm going to tell you right now, the man in the ring did an outstanding job. He has nothing to be ashamed of here, and there were so many times we thought this thing was over with him the winner. But in the end, those rubber gloves backfired on him, and gave Press what he needed to take home the gold.
CAT: I just don't have the words, Percy. I thought there'd be a huge celebration in the back, fireworks, champagne. Harris has been so unstoppable, I just didn't believe he could be beaten.
PERCY: Every man has his day, and I for one hope to see these two go at it again in the near future, but right now it looks like they could do with some medical attention.
Press reaches the stage area, and doesn't even have the strength to give his usual fanfare after a huge win. He turns back around with a stumble in front of the curtain, and points out at the crowd, slapping his chest, and holds out the championship. The fans explode in cheers, until the lights suddenly go out. The big screen behind the big man lights up, and a mask appears on the screen, drawing everyone's attention.
PERCY: What the hell is this?
CAT: Do I recognize that mask?
The lights suddenly come on, and Press continues staring up at the screen, a confused look spread across his face. The crowd reacts to something, and he looks from side to side, unsure of what they are going so crazy for.
PERCY: OH MY GOD!
CAT: IS...IS THAT......
PERCY: DEUS! DEUS IS STANDING RIGHT BEHIND THE PAW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION!
Press finally clues in that whatever has the crowd on edge is back in the ring, and he turns around expecting to see Calvin Harris barreling up the ramp after him. Instead, he finds a person, non-descript in their gender, wearing a solid black jump suit, and a full black mask with an almost roman design around the brow, that streak down the sides like a helmet. Press cocks his head to the side in confusion, and takes a step forward, just as Deus' hand flashes out in front to strike the champion in the face. Press drops like a sack of potatoes, and Deus lifts the black glove, adjusting it with the other hand to pull it tight. The camera zooms in, and brass knuckles can be seen along the fingers.
PERCY: Oh no.....this is a repeat of what happened nearly 10 months ago when The BombTrax first made their return to main stream wrestling in EW! They came out and attacked Deus after her championship match, and he was never seen again!
CAT: How do you know it was a he? I heard it was a her!
PERCY: EITHER WAY SHIT'S ABOUT TO GET BAD!
Deus drops down to straddle the PAW champion's chest, and with one hand cradles his head tenderly, while raising the fist with brass knuckles high above her head. The fist drops like a bomb down into Press' forehead, and continue like the pistons on an engine, until the blows go from a hard thudding sound to a wet packing sound. Blood splatters every which way, and the fists keep reigning down until finally they come to a sudden stop. Rising in one fluid motion, Deus takes a step back, and the lights drop. Screams can be heard throughout the arena, phones flashing all over the place, until as quickly as they had went out, they came back on.
PERCY: Oh God....someone get out here.
CAT: I...
At the top of the ramp, Press is sitting his famed 'Press Pass' chair, his head tilted forward for all to see. His face is nearly unrecognizable from all of the blood, and his arms hang limply at his side. Calvin Harris, who has finally exited the ring, looks up at the scene with hands on his hips, and then shrugs with a laugh, before walking beside the ramp to the back through the bottom exit. The screen flickers on behind the seated mess of flesh that is Press, and everyone's eyes are drawn to the unfolding story backstage.